Not goodbyeee after all!
by VixterHellcat16
Summary: When Blackadder, Darling, Baldric and George are found by the infamous witch twins Jane and Alec they take them to join the elite Volturi guards because of their individual skills. Will Baldric look good and will love blossom. BlackadderxJane.


**A/N: I'm proud to present my BlackadderxTwillight fic. Enjoy and Reveiw.**

Blackadder's POV:

We swung our legs over the sand bags and out of the squalor we call trenches, No sooner did we get out the trench bullets were being pelted at us faster than you could say "Baldric is a blithering idiot!" That was when I heard the terminally stupid and naive George yell something upon the lines of... "By Jove, this war is so much different than it's cracked up to be and whatnot, what with bullets flying too-and-fro no wonder so many of our tommies haven't come back." It didn't really come as a shock that he only just figured this out, the real shocker was that his half-a-cell-short-of-an-amoeba of a brain had figured it out at all! "George, keep moving or you'll get shot, and I don't want to have to write to your dim yet somehow extraordinarily rich family to tell them that their equally dim son is dead!" I yelled at him. At precisely that moment your average dim solider went tearing ahead of me, Baldric, George and Darling, and just so conveniently had to tread on a mine a few metres away, just close enough to shower debris all over us, not enough to kill us instantly but so we would die a slow, and guaranteed to be painful, death! Just the way I wanted to go!

The pain in my knee-cap and chest was excruciating, I closed my eyes desperately willing the pain away! I was screaming in perfect harmony with the other three comrades who I was sentenced to die with, I couldn't even ditch those daft dimbos in death! Someone up there has it in for me, and once I get up there they will be in bigger trouble than the dinosaurs when they discovered that there was going to be a mass extinction! After what felt like hours guns ceased to fire, everyone had retreated. I chanced opening my eyes; I then began to use what little energy I had left to rotate my head. I saw Baldric, George and Darling lying there in the mud barely breathing, drenched in their own blood.

I then rotated my head to the west, facing the setting sun. I saw a young girl of about 14, with the palest most flawless skin I'd ever seen. She was tiny, slim and androgynous, she wore pale nondescript clothes underneath a cloak in so dark a shade of grey it was nearly black, she had short mousey brown hair, but she did not need long hair... her face was beautiful – and perfect – enough to make up for this. The wide eyed, full lipped face complete with a button nose would make Botticelli angel look like a gargoyle! Even allowing for the bright ruby irises framed with long thick black lashes and small pristine eyebrows. I stared at her, a boy about her age was now beside her; they could be twins! Only he had shorter darker chocolate brown hair and his lips weren't as full. She spoke in a high tinkling voice, as perfect as the rest of her, her voice reminded me of a peal of sleigh bells! "What about these ones?" She asked "They've been clinging on for hours, they must be fighters, lord knows Felix needs a break! This one..." she said pointing at me "... he must be smart I can practically hear his brain whirring with plans, He..." She now pointed at Darling "Is very talented I can feel it" she pointed at George next, "That one is very loyal I heard him murmuring something about not leaving the cap! And as for him..." she gestured toward Baldric "Lord knows he could use our beauty to at least look a bit better, the poor sod deserves to have some experience of looking decent! Even by human standards he's ugly!" What the hell did she mean by "Human standards" does she not mean animal standards! T he boy laughed "You have proved your point, my sister, they shall do." He decided. A-ha so they _are _related! Not a second later I found myself cradled in a stone cold – and hard arm – in the other arm was none other than Darling. Trees and bushes were blurred as we streaked by. Trees and bushes! There was no foliage for miles so where'd all this vegetation come from?

It had been about two hours now. But, strangely, it was still Twilight! They slowed to a fast walk a dark fabric enclosed around me and Darling concealing us from view. After a bit I felt myself falling but the arm had never released me! Suddenly I no longer felt the falling sensation, but I hadn't felt anyone land either. About a millisecond later I heard a scrape of metal and the person carrying me resumed their speed walking.

Jane's POV:

Oh yes, Aro was going to be happy with this lot... The loyal one Alec was carrying was tall and lanky with a hearty spirit, he was a perfect example of a hunter type, the kind like Heidi, who stay at home and lure prey in for us to feed on. This man with a humoured spirit and an eager, forward-going and light-hearted personality was the perfect person to aid Heidi – maybe sometimes Santiago when recruiting closer to home - when he could control himself. The small ugly one'd probably be good at spying. Small, lumpy people who nobody gave a backward glance to, that's what was needed for a spy! 'Cause no one'd ever suspect 'em. The one with Brown hair was like Corin, apparently – when she was human - Santiago and a bunch of others knew she was special and she had never once shown any signs of being "special" or gifted as we say. Only when they took her to Eleazar did they prove (as they suspected) that she did in fact have a gift, she could (and still can) change someone/something's mental and physical health. I think this one'll be similar. Now our black haired captain. He seems to be the brains of the group... why I'd wager my – and my brother's – clothes and virginity that his head was bursting with brilliant, cunning plots and plans! We needed more of those people – the planners – the ones who plot our tactics with Aro; they are V.I.P if ever I saw them.

They almost have a higher status than me, Alec and the Wives! They are going to be amazing, I just know it! We were near the throne room now and all four hearts were miraculously still beating. I was sure my eyes would be burgundy now, being around four sources of blood for two hours, even after feeding and being trained by the best (The Volturi) how to control yourself, still made you thirsty.

I strode into the throne room by the smell of it they'd just eaten dinner! I spoke up "Masters, me and Alec think we've found suitable candidates for the guard." Aro looked delighted as I gently laid my burden on the pristine marble floor. I held out my hand, Aro took it – reading my thoughts from the past two hours. "Ah, Jane –my dear one – they shall all make a perfect addition to the guard." He appraised me.

"Marcus, Caius. Would you mind helping me change them?" he asked. They looked at him, Caius questioningly. "I can only manage one then I need a 15 minutes break to redeem myself before I can continue to change another and I'm afraid if we wait to change them much longer they shall not survive the change!" he explained. They nodded and they glided forward. Alec now set his soon-to-be-Vampires on the floor, every bit as gently as me.

Caius glided to the side of the small badger like one; Marcus to the lanky, cheerful one and Aro to the cunning captain. They simultaneously crouched down and bit into the men's jugulars. Three agonized screams carried through the Volturi HQ! Aro rested for 15 minutes before crouching down and biting him as well. The fourth resulting scream indicated the beginning of all these men's destinies! The screaming is a sign; a sign not of pain – although it is still there and taunting you for days on end and constantly bringing dull reminders with thirst, but it's a small price to pay – it's a sign of change, something new, of rebirth, a sign of a second shot at a better life, an immortal life, an sensually and physically advanced life. That is why when people scream and writhe when "violated" with my gift I smile, it never ceases to remind me of the 2nd chances and opportunities the change from mere human to glorious Vampire.

**A/N: Well, wa'da'ya think, plz drop me a reveiw. Hope you enjoyed my fic, Vixter-twihard.**


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